Miles Dyson and Tony

As my summer classes proceeded, Miles Dyson (who was formerly known as Valitudinarian, see former posting) continued to display his strange, aloof behavior. He arrived early, sat and stared straight ahead at the board each day. He was a very good student, just a very strange student. It didn't take long for another student to also pick up that Miles was pretty smart.

Tony (that was his English name) was a goof off. He came to class twice, then was absent for the next three weeks. When he was in class, he would make threatening gestures toward Miles.
When I say threatening gestures, I mean fashioning his hand like a gun, pointing it, and delivering a few bullets at Miles. This was unnerving. This went on for a week or two and then Tony disappeared again.

Test day came and low and behold, Tony showed up to class and sat next to Miles. Hmmm...I thought, that's weird! I gave out the exam and sat down. It was then I realized why these two were seated next to each other. Tony was cheating off Miles and Miles was letting him. I let the two of them go on and then I made my move. I moved quietly toward them, took both their exams and asked them to go outside of the classroom.

Red, shaking and clearly angry that they were caught, they moved quietly. I got outside and quietly asked, "What is going on here?" No explanation, just blank stares. Again, "what is going on, do you, Miles want to tell me what is going on here?" No, he said. Tony was shaking and red.
I looked at Tony and said " Why are you sitting next to Miles today?" "You never sit next to Miles, in fact, I've seen you make threats towards him in class." Silence!

I told the both of them they flunked this test. I then instructed Tony to go back to class.
I asked Miles again, "Did Tony ask you to cheat?" "No" Miles said.
I was astonished, I thought Miles would crack.

Back at the office, I spoke to my colleague about what happened in class. She was more in tune with Asian culture than I was and informed me that this was normal. "Huh," I said sheepishly.
Bullying is a big problem within this culture, one is the bully, the other is the victim. The victim stays quiet for fear of being found out. The bully continues to press and get his way. I busted up the arrangement. Great, I thought, poor Miles. If he shows up with a black eye to class tomorrow, I'll know what happened. I went home that night thinking this was going to end badly. Culturally, I could not let this stand, I had to teach them both that in America, we don't cheat, we don't lie (except if you happen to be a politician, banker, the Goldman Sachs CEO or a priest) and we are not operating under Chinese cultural expectations.

Much to my surprise, Tony did not return to school. Miles did not show up with a black eye.
In the end, Tony ended up flunking my class. Miles went on to school to study economics and I learned a big lesson. Be fearless! Engage the students regardless of the outcome.

Question is, can I remember this for the next time?

Yes, women are emotional and stupid!

One of my favorite things about teaching is discovering what various cultures think about gender. It is no surprise (and this may sound ethnocentric) that Americans are a bit more ahead
than the rest of the world when it comes to this particular subject. I think this because, by now, I've had way too many conversations where I end up exasperated and shocked.

Case in point, my summer session students had a chapter dealing with gender roles. I planned exercises to get them to share what they know about gender and we created discussion groups, creating questions and answers. What I wasn't prepared for was the blatant remarks made by, no, not the men, but the women! One young lady insisted, "Women are too weak, they cry all the time?" I said, "Really? You're a woman, do you cry all the time?" Oh no, not me, I mean women.
"Ok, I said, why do you think women are weak?" "Because that's true," she said. My students have issues defending their answers with meaningful analysis.

I proceed to spend some time trying to talk about stereotypes, how it is defined and present some stereotypes about both men and women. I state, "men are strong and don't cry" Yes, this is true, they all agree. No, I quip, this is a stereotype. "Women cry and are weak", oh yes, this is true. No, I say again, this is not true, this is a stereotype. "No, women are emotional and stupid", yells one young woman. Shocked, I remain standing, looking into the faces of these people.

It is at times like this when I realize that my mission isn't to try and convince them of something that they themselves have never thought of. My mission is to try and get them to think, period!
Yeah, good luck with that!